Archive for January, 2010


The submissions for the Edgewood Review, my college’s little annual literary collection, are due soon, so I’ve spent some of my time this morning working on shaping up stories. The tentative plan is to submit The King of Pecatonica County and Always Happy to Serve You. I don’t have anything as good as my submission last year, but it’s worth a shot. The group saw the first story last year – I submitted it after it got a good reception in my class workshop, and it was tentatively accepted until I submitted something much better. However, last year the magazine’s editor was also a fan of my work, and she graduated, so it’s more of an uphill struggle. We’ll see how it goes.

In any case, while editing, I mentioned to Courtney that I’m not very good at physical descriptions. She agreed, and pointed out that the one’s I’d put in were long after we met the respective characters, and stated that I should practice my descriptions by doing them of real-life people. I like this idea. So, without further ado, I present Wilson-style descriptions of my friends and myself. Guys, don’t take it personally.


Isaac is a thin, nearly gangly individual of average height. His most notable features are his typical look of slight confusion, his beard, which splotches up like an invasive weed despite any grooming efforts, and his hairline, which long ago abandoned his forehead and now loses ground on his scalp with every passing year. He smells of motor oil and baby.


Ben is a gentle giant, a tall, quiet fellow with dark brown hair and a smile that can make him look a bit dopier than he really is. If I didn’t know better, I’d swear that Isaac’s missing hair had simply migrated, colonizing Ben’s upper back and neck. Despite his height, he’s rather nonthreatening, especially since his normal stance is sitting, slightly hunched, staring intently at a computer screen.


Whereas Ben’s smile is dopey, Courtney’s always looks loaded; There’s mischief or planning behind it. Her hair, which is currently a rusty brown, changes colors with her whim, probably more often than is healthy, though each change is agonized over. Her other most notable feature is her chest, which somehow sticks out farther than her nose, and which she tends to show off a bit, much to her boyfriend’s dismay – those are his, after all.


Taylor is a lumpy little fellow pushing a B cup with his moobs. His hair is perpetually greasy, which doesn’t even help to add a gloss to the dull brown. He typically has a look of boredom or disinterest, unless he is actually interested in something, in which case his eyes bug out and he stares way too intently and gets way too close to the person in question. He is almost always in a Hawaiian shirt and cargo khakis, even in summer, which makes him sweat, which makes him seem even greasier. His glasses are usually dirty and slightly crooked.

So there you have it. Now I wait for Isaac and Ben to kill me.

And I Didn’t Know It

This is the first poem I’ve written since my senior year of high school. Those, too, were assignments. This is written somewhat in advance for my Poetry Writing class.

I can’t tell if it’s subconsciously intentional or not that my first poem – a format I’m nervous about writing – mimics in style my most successful short story.

In any case, the following is presented in extremely rough status. I welcome feedback, and already know it needs more colorful language. Presenting

Though the Streetlights Mask the Stars


I’ve never lived on my own before. Even living on campus, there was always an odd kind of handholding – intended or no, I didn’t feel alone. Now, even though I have apartment-mates (though my own room, thank God), I feel much more independant.

I haven’t been in a writing mood lately, with all the stuff I’ve had to do, and much of my creativity at the moment has been funneled toward the D&D campaign that I am now running. I’m starting from scratch with this one, so it’s been tough generating a town, an antagonist, everything required to create a world. I’m still not done and I know I’ve put hours in. I don’t want to spend money on supplements, but I fear it may be necessary.

Finally, I’ve taken a poetry writing class this semester, so those items, along with whatever else I write (besides, like, actual papers) will be posted here. I promise nothing in terms of quality, however.

You Have Got To Be Kidding Me

So I’m minding my own business this morning, reading Consumerist, when I stumble across this.


I’m really beyond words at this point, so I’m going to just post image macro reactions.

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Header photo by David Reber's Hammer Photography. Many ideas and images copyright Blizzard.